Lock Down

#3 Same Same

Two more days and we are meant to be done with this level of lockdown, which is the highest for New Zealand. We are currently on level 4, basically, full lockdown which was initially set out for a period of four weeks which would end this Wednesday.

Today we are awaiting the big news whether this period will be extended or if we are going to drop down to level 3 which would lift some of the lockdown restrictions.

At the beginning of the full lockdown, I couldn’t wait to get through this. The first week actually went super fast. Every day was kind of new and somewhat exciting. What are we doing today? What can I do instead of my usual routine? Is there something new I could try now that I have time? How do I make sure to stay safe? 

The second week came by and somehow it felt like we got into a new routine. It actually started to feel normal and almost like “hey, this isn’t too bad – we can do this no sweat”. That week I felt super motivated and enjoyed the positive changes this lockdown brought along – less noise, people being more considerate and looking out for one another, so many great offerings online and opportunities to connect, families going for walks and bike rides, …life all of a sudden became simple, raw. Yet, it felt good. The connection with our loved ones, knowing we have everything we need during such a difficult time. Thoughts of gratitude exploded more and more with each day.

And slowly week three crawled along making every day feel the same. At least for myself, it was then when I had moments where I desperately missed people. Being face-to-face, hugging my friends and family. I craved going for a surf and swim in the ocean. But these moments passed. My partner and I keep reminding each other how lucky we are to be in a country like New Zealand during this pandemic. And we are. However, this didn’t change my perception of every day being the same. Even though each day I try to get some work done, I try to learn something new or work on something creative; even though I kept researching and learning about all those things that have been sitting on my list since forever. All of this didn’t change that creepy dullness hanging over my head. It’s almost like standing in a big, empty room and going “Helloooooo??? Anyone out there?”. 

This week didn’t feel much different. I learned some cool new stuff about surfing, oceans, watercolouring, … I pulled out my guitar again, which has been neglected for too long. All those things probably wouldn’t have happened for another long time without this lockdown. So I guess boredom stimulates creativity. I hate being bored so much that I will find something to occupy my brain to somehow make each day feel a little different. It’s kind of funny how we are so used to being out and about and before all of the Covid-19 lifestyle these little things hardly get appreciated. At least I can say that for myself. Even though I practice gratitude daily, those tiny things often slip my mind. Like popping into a meeting for a new project, heading over to a friend for a tea, having a browse through the book store, walking along the beach and deciding it’s too hot so a quick dip in the ocean follows. All those little things that we probably don’t plan much, but we have the freedom to do them except now. 

Whatever the decision is going to be about our lockdown level today, we will drop down to level 3 once we are ready and when we do, I will be excited even about the most tiniest changes to our lifestyle. It will probably still be almost the same as in level 4. We might just turn it into a same same, but different situation.

What feelings have been coming up for you and what do you do to get through these strange times?

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